Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
I was talking to some girls while you were falling off your bar stool into the person next to you.
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!
I don't want a mention or even a whisper of a Shakespeare Festival by that or any other name including, but not limited to, a fucking Renaissance Fair. Are we clear? It will be a DEALBREAKER .
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
We really shouldn't need this many nicknames for the women you've had sex with.
Oh, don't mind me, that's just my vagina rattling.
If I make it through this whole bridesmaid process without anyone knowing that I actually hate everyone but the bride, including the groom, I deserve a complimentary bottle of vodka.
Look fucker, my sensibility and attention to detail is the ONLY REASON you're not dead now
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
Randomize
