I just had sex in the back of an ambulance. Call me.
Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
i feel like i want to date him just so i could be besties with his penis
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
He called my vagina a rainforest. This is coming from a guy whose pubes are longer than his dick.
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
We're now referring to our nightly Skype time as "strokes of genius." Long distance sucks.
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
I saved a note for myself but all it said was "am I a slutty Holden Caulfield?"
Drunk you needs to learn how to call sober me, so sober me can talk your drunk vagina down.
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
Randomize
