Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
Jesus Christ, she just started playing Enya and is humming along to it. Way, way, way too hungover to deal with her shitty taste in music
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
Found your dick twin last night
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
Trusting in Jesus is not a viable birth control plan.
Your boyfriend being in jail is really helping my social life! #GotASingleDrinkingBuddyAgain
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
Randomize
