When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
I thought smoking would make her look better, but all it did was enlighten me to her snaggletooth
Sounds like a blessing in disguise
I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
If I saw Perez Hilton naked I think I would stick a lit candle down my throat.
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
My wrist bandage is guacamole stained. What an accurate representation of my life as a whole
the realtor just took us to a house I had a one night stand in. I feel like it's a sign.
The cops forgot your handle of tequila when they took you away. Taking shots in your honor amigo
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
Sometimes at I wake up from a dead sleep at 1am and call the bar just to hear the clink of the glasses and the pouring of the beer on tap in the backround
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
The irony of the fact that I'm going to be starting my period on Thanksgiving. Something to truly be thankful for.
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
Just woke up in a Price Chopper bathroom stall with a half eaten cake on the floor. Had to get a ride from the waitress I made out with. What happened to "Don't let me drink Tequila?"
I lied.
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
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