what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
Someone should tell Glenda that I only hang with her because she makes me look prettier.
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
im the poster child for why you shouldnt play beer pong with wine.
85% positive I just found a hair of a certain variety wayyy in the back of my mouth between two teeth while flossing.
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
What! I said that you would fall in love? See I know better. Dark liquor makes me think everything is a dream. I barely remember saying that
Randomize
