She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
we need to start a braincell conservation fund for you, sort of like save the whales or something.
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
There is a full size piano in the middle of our road. Please tell me you had nothing to do with this.
I just spent the last ten minutes making a timeline of my sex life. 2010 and 2011 I am calling "I can't believe Im still clean" years.
I can't tell if I'm hungover or if my cat just knocked the lamp on my face
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
So this is how i'm celebrating Easter? By eating chicken nuggets and masturbating all day. What a life.
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
The good news is I woke up fully clothed, on top of my covers, with a half eaten granola bar. So, breakfast was waiting for me and I’m already dressed and ready to go today.
the person she was housesitting for had a christmas card from charlie sheen on the fridge so we fucked on the couch and just slept in the bed
Randomize
