we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
I thought I would take a shower to wake me up but now I'm naked wet and stoned laying on my bed instead of just stoned laying on my bed
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
i was debating whether to load antoher bowl when i realized i was holding a sandwich in one hand and a cookie in the other. and laughing.
I can't bring an entire liter in the bar in my purse. I mean I can. I might. I'm probably gonna.
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
Someone's vagina was extra sandy cause the left side of my bed feels like the beach.
College: when you wake up drunk without pants and wearing a Cosby sweater
You spent like 10 minutes trying to hit a golf ball that was actually a cigarette butt. And then fell over.
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
Randomize
