another moral hangover. fuck.
I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
I sent him pictures of just me in my thong and he replied "you're so sweet, you make me feel special <3".... Oh.
You were a path of destruction, you started with eating half the cake, proceeded by throwing the rest in the sink and dumping water all over it while laughing... then throwing the drunk helmet across the room yelling that you didnt want to wear it... i'd say it was a successful birthday.
Remember don't think of it as being an alcoholic until something bad happens.
Think of it as Mythbusters for people who say you're going to get arrested or die
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
I think i should wear mittens next time we have sex.
ugh... fuck pirate breakfast. my head is like thirsty.
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
There's a stripper getting there at 10 though so hopefully I'm out before the stripper gets there. I don't have time to deal with a stripper.
you said, "the pool was totally tequila. and i left my shoe halfway across town. and by shoe i mean car" it appeared to me that you didn't have your shoes or car.
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
Randomize
