Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
I knew it would be a shit show so I just went ahead and took plan b before I even got there. How's that for responsible?
I would love a rich wife. Then I would be like a gym teacher or some shit. Bigfoot hunter maybe.
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
My boss just texted me, clearly drunk, and said get down here pronto with a handle of rum, 50 lbs. of cold cuts, and a BB gun. This is not why I went to law school.
When we got into his bed, his damn parrot started making sex noises in the other room
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
Randomize
