i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
He turned me down because he was still doing his taxes.
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
I will not fill you in on the details until we get back, so do not ask. I got peed on by the girl I was hooking up with last night.
I am far too hungover to deal with the fact I can hear you masturbating in the bathroom.
Going to jail was so much more fun than I thought it would be. I feel like I walked away with more than just a bomb-ass mugshot, I feel like I made some life long friends.
Celebratory bar crawl?
She just texted me apologizing for taking selfies on my phone then asked me to send them to her
For the sake of being nice I congratulated her and she replied with something along the lines of that I need to stay away from him and not touch him ever. I really wanted to be like "been there, done that" but my New Years resolution was to not start any cat fight over boys with small dicks before noon
It's like all the guys I keep around if I wanna have sex with all got mad at the same time. I guess I'll get out my vibrator again.
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
My cat is watching me play with my new vibrator
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. She asked how my day was going and it got hard.
He said he broke his back in 3 spots & my first thought was "there goes my booty call".
Did u have a 2nd thought
I need a new booty call.
Randomize
