hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
Just had to open a tuna can with a spoon. Gave me a sense of hunting for my own food.
I smelled like jager and penis. The only cure was a pack of camels and plan b.
I just shaved my vag with a razor my dad left when he was here a few months ago. Too hungover to think about the Freudian connotations
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
I tried to face swap with Chuck Norris. His face was too powerful... it broke my snap chat.
The cops high fived after they tackled you
Randomize
