i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
You smell like a Billy Joel song
the only compliment i could think of for this chick was that she looked 'moderately attractive'
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
I mean, you've seen me eat pizza, sober, out of a garbage can, and yet I refuse to go eat at that place. Just sayin....
This is a weird combination of planning and sexting but whatever
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
I had to carry him up the hill while he was wearing nothing but knee high socks and a blue glitter sequin leotard.
Why is this not a picture message?
don't take offense to this but at the strip club tonight I legit believed one girl was you. almost hopped on stage and freaked out at you. you're a beauty.
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
I often worry that if I get famous, people from my past will recognize me and start talking to the media
Randomize
