Why did u sent me a picture of a dead horse?
i could hear you having sex and was jealous, wanted to kill the mood
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
gettin pulled by a cop with a camera crew. gonna flee. want my 15 min of fame on cops.
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
My water bill is like twice the normal amount. I need a boyfriend.
Do I even want to know?
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
I was like ahh were on two different pages, I know there's rumors of me moving to boston but I can't and I'm not adding long distance to the relationship I have with my 31 year old recently divorced ex boss
Randomize
