Yeah, but I'm out of licorice and there's no way anywhere near here will rent us all mopeds on a Tuesday night.
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
I feel bad for her, but I feel like she's one of those resource-raping alien civilizations that visits planets, decimates them and then leaves. Those really aren't the qualities I appreciate in a friend. Ya know?
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
No, the moral of my Oxford interview was "Never snort caffeine pills".
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
He said he'd prefer a photo rather than discuss politics, I sent him a snapchat "conservative shorts 4 conservative man". He said "be liberal"
Some days you ride the struggle bus. Other days, it gets a flat, the AC breaks, and you run over a bunny.
I just got a snapchat of a flaccid penis with the caption "happy belated valentine's day." What did I do to deserve this
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
She moved all of her stuff out while we were gone. Shit in the toilet, and didn’t flush. So yeah it went well.
Randomize
