Take 3 tylenol pms and try to whack off before you pass out. It's impossible.
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
MY DAD KEEPS LIKING PORN LINKS/ALBUMS ON FACEBOOK AND THEY ALL SHOW UP IN MY NEWSFEED
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
My roommate just angrily told the cat he should have knocked, but that's not lockdown madness. They're always like that.
Randomize
