I'm done trying to be a vegetarian. My vagina smells like hummus.
That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
we are playing family charades. my sister pointed at me. everyone guessed alcoholic.
Not going out tonight. And so the 25 day drinking streak ends....
I remember saying to him "Fun fact! If you lie this way it's easier to deep throat!" I even judge me.
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
where will you be at 9:30 tonight?
piledriving you in your roommate's bed?
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
Well there's a microwave in my yard now too. I fucking Bruce/Caitlyn Jennered decathloned that bitch.
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
I'm watching Netflix with my cats and eating homemade bread. Everyone and everything can go and fuck itself.
You kept saying “keke” over and over so I slapped you then you proceeded to ask if I loved you. In case you’re wondering why you have a black eye - Lauren
Dude why is my bed and bedding wrapped in bubble wrap?
Cuz u wanted to insure u had a safe sleep
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