My nipple is on Facebook.
you know you were way too high when you wake up next to a handwritten list of all the things you'd do for a Klondike bar
My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
this ugly chick literally cried last night because i wouldnt let her give me head
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
My drug dealer just made me a sandwich at the local deli. Starting to question his street cred.
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
It was a sobriety test blowjob. If he could get it up, he could get me home.
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
I'm sitting at work trying to dust glitter off my pants. I can't hang out with her anymore.
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
Randomize
