If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
my roommate's gf just broke up with him and hes in his room crying and listening to coldplay while beating off to pictures of her...
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
Why is there an empty beer bottle in the shower?
Why wouldn't there be.
She was really sick last night--but i was too drunk to bring her chicken noodle soup after the bar, so went by taco bell and got her a chicken burrito instead
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
Plans for halloween need to outrank Caesar, Cleopatra and Mark Antony's threesome...just saying
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
I recently had a rabies scare because I thought putting socks on my hands to pick up a squirrel that got in my house was a good idea.
The number of mornings I actually have to say out loud to myself "you must put pants on and go to work" to get motivated is...troubling.
If you're funny as hell and have a mustache, odds are I'm probably gonna fuck you
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
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