And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
Sex with him was like teaching a two year old how to work a machine gun
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
Returning my drunken purchases from last night. Not a single thing I bought was on sale.
Only in my life does a conversation about Hanukkah lead to sexting
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
I need all the beers. I want to be holding on to the grass so I don't fall off the earth drunk.
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
Randomize
