My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
i can't believe you bought a jetta. you know that's a girl car, right? if i hadn't had sex with you, i'd have no other proof you're straight.
so i was eating a special k bar this morning for breakfast and started choking on it so i reached into my bag for water turns out it was liquor.
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
This is the moment in my life where I take a fork in the "nice guy" road ive traveled for 23 years and fuck everything in sight that doesnt have herpes, or is in-between flare ups and I don't know about it until my dick is on fire.
You did this to me with your delicious pizza and moonshine.
I'll forgive you once we're drunk again by noon.
ummm im also counting the $14 dollars I gave the old guy to pay for the cab I called for him to take to the hospital last night as part of ur present.
You don't have a wife, you don't have a dog, and you need a new bong. Don't make this any worse than that.
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
Randomize
