Who tried to make mustard cubes with the ice cube tray?
there is a priest convention in the hotel. i feel like god is laughing at me.
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
Today my mom told me "that's what worries me about you getting blacked out drunk... You don't look pretty"
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
I swear the crows are laughing at me.
You my friend are stoned into submission
I think he just caught a duck in mid flight
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
Remember that time I hopped home naked from the bar, then tried to convince you I was ok to drive you home? Good call on the taxi.
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
Turns out I screen transfered my streaming trucker restroom porn vid to the downstairs neighbors'TV instead of my own, damn you chromecast
Randomize