I had a dream last night that we were eating cake at Mercy...hahaha. I'm furious I didn't see you.
If you text me again I will gut all of your stuffed animals.
Why the fuck was there a shirtless Mexican in my apartment this morning?
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
WERE YOU GOING TO TELL ME THERE WAS A LOAF OF BANANA BREAD IN THE OVEN BEFORE YOU LEFT FOR A 5 HOUR SHIFT??
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
Mega depressed bro. Had the greatest sex with the hottest girl I've ever seen and in the AM she gave me that look I've given dozens of times. I'm her drunken fat chick fuck
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
But seriously, I love having sex with you and simultaneously know I never wanna date you.
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
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