Your dad touched me again.
I think my vagina is haunted
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
Just assessed the damage in the bath. Two love bites. One bruise on the inner thigh. Strange awareness of what i'm assuming is my cervix. I've definitely missed you. x
i honestly don't know why someone didn't cut me off after i broke the ceiling lamp with MY HEAD
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
There's only two more days left to say you saw me naked this year.....I'll bring the booze, you got all of next year to rationalize why.
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
The moment when you go to plug in someone else's phone in your car and your lube is in the way. Don't mind that it's just my center console car lube. Normal.
I'm not going to waste the next hour of my life writing a diplomatic email explaining that she's bitch. I have Parks and Rec to watch.
Randomize
