New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
I'm going to but the new Playboy with Chelsea Handler on the cover. I'm pretty sure it's the only time buying a Playboy will make me gayer...
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
Whenever I'm not in the mood and don't want to go to bed swampy, I just strategically suck him off during the second period intermission of the Cup playoffs and he leaves me alone and does the dishes. It's a win-win.
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
It's really life affirming to be at a wedding thinking wow I took your husbands virginity
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
I just found my phone after looking for it since yesterday afternoon it was in the fridge.
Enjoy your early 30’s! You’re still young enough to catch a twenty something that can fuck 4 times a day, hot enough to date forty year old penises that can last long enough to give you multiple orgasms
Randomize
