Don't tits with veins remind you of road maps?
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
its taking every last moral i have not to steal this bike
you still have morals?
Well actually itd just be too hard to ride the bike with this large rake i just stole
i have a picture in my phone of you with a bottle of tequila in your back pocket. i believe you were saying "pocket of champions" or something along those lines
I'm wearing red that night.
Noted, what shade?
Whore.
It's 9am. I'm four lines ahead of you already. Wake up.
sometimes after I smoke and the high has gone away...the high will come back like three hours later for a brief yet gripping ride.
that's usually when I end up in someone's house, having sex with someone else, while that someone's roommate makes us mozzarella sticks.
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
He told me to come in and have some water before I drove home, my vagina didn't stand a chance escaping. We didn't even make it to the kitchen.
The only thing I'm asking santa for is my period.
And vodka?
And vodka.
Yeah, my new jeep also came with custom license plates that read 4SKIIN. Not "4 skin" but "4 skiing" thanks mom and dad
No one knows how to work that "I pulled a muscle in my leg" drunk swagger like you can
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
Randomize
