That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
You can't just hum the Jaws theme song when you pull down my pants.
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
I'm tangled in a fishing net down at the harbor. This has nothing to do with Captain Morgan. Bring wirecutters.
Alright we have to be drunk.before noon tomorrow. Its a new law i just got passed through congress. It goes into effect imediately
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
I rubbed his back while he puked for an hour and then ended up getting laid when I tried to put him to bed, best puke and rally I've ever seen.
I'd like to preapologize if you or your mom see me naked at some point this weekend.
man fuck you i am a delight. you're the one who fucking set his tree on fire while high
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
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