Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
I just went in my fridge and said to my turkey "see you thursday". I seriously have issues
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
Maybe it was that imaginary ghost dick you were stuffing in your mouth a minute ago
He woke up in a dragon costume, covered in bong water. That was a party we will regret missing.
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
Enroute to my place eta 6 mikes...estimated time until intoxicated? 45 mikes. Commence the timer.
I had sex with him in the back of my car in a duck onesie. I'm worth something dammit.
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
He was so traumatized by the It's a small world ride but he immediately pulled out a flask from god-knows-where and got drunk before the ride was over. The ride operator didn't blame him.
I guess I called her at 2am, demanding that she bring us food. She told us to order pizza, and I yelled "DON'T MENTION PIZZA!" I recall nothing.
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
Randomize
