I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
whoa...plan B gets you drunker quicker.
He came on my face and tried to draw out a smiley face because he said I looked like I had a bad day
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
Took 45 minutes to masturbate. Fuck you Zoloft. I'm never gonna be diagnosed with depression again
it's 2:30 on a sunday and I just won a wine chugging contest. I'm never graduating.
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
Randomize
