I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
take the plastic off of my new air freshener and i'm not going to eat you out for a month.
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
I've never felt so epic in my entire life as I do right now, my bare testicles staring down the ocean itself
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
I had sex on a dinosaur comforter, tell me that does not define my life.
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
She said "we just have chemistry" ... I wanted to say "no, you just have a vagina."
That isn't the worst part. It got a bazillion times more awkward when he read me a poem he wrote about his dead cat.
She meowed at me. Repeatedly. Then she asked what was wrong with me because I didn't understand her.
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
Randomize
