i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
Approach what situation? Look, I dunno if you think I'm like some lezbo cheetah waitin in some shrubs to pounce on you the second I see you, but I'm not!
well, everyone in my office is getting a nice laugh right now. But seriously... please delete my number
i mean really, i cant compete with a cucumber
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
I just dumped out my gym water bottle and filled it with white wine. This is the end.
so how does soaking flintstones gummy vitamins in vodka not make perfect sense
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
Halfway through he got an idea for a short story so he wrote it in magic marker on my boobs. Yeah, he's a keeper.
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
He is just a personification of a vodka hangover.
Yes. Sex with questionable women, and made of potatoes.
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
someone at the bars was yelling at the bouncer to let him in because he "just passed through the 7 levels of the candy cane forrest" soulmate?
go meet him and give him your number.
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
Randomize