the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
aaaannd alcoholism beats pride. it's like grown-up rock, paper, scissors
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
So I hear you're taking over showing your penis responsibilities now that I'm gone?
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
If you need to be the damsel in drunken distress make sure it's before 3.
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
I've got a bottle of water, a bag of salad greens, and a bottle of hot sauce. How stoned do you think I am?
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
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