I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
i think i will get a tattoo on my butt that says "im not bluffin with my muffin", but i guess if i was serious, i would get it above my c-section scar
She calls her new ritual "bed, bath, and beyond crunk". Hence why I found her passed out in my bath tub this morning.
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
thank god my boss can't smell the tequila on my breathe over the phone.
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
just spent $80 on an im sorry breakfast from mcdonalds for everyone sleeping in my apartment for being a drunkass and locking everyone out of the apartment at 2am.
Seeing your one night stand on campus never gets less awkward. Why is Subway the only good place to eat?
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
Pretty sure that I just proved those labels that say "non-flammable" wrong. totally unrelated, We just made your futon fly with a shitload of fireworks
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
My Boss was giving porn recommendations. I think I'm scarred for life.
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