there's paper in my vomit.
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
guys i just found a dildo in the laundry room and its purple
whats a dildo? isnt that like a fancy piece of bread?
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
Just so you're aware, tomorrow is "Slow Clap when you see Mike" day.
She was humming during sex. After I asked her why, she said it was her sex theme music
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
He gave me twenty cool ranch tacos and declared, drunk, " Look, I do good"
Ps we ordered a pizza at the pool today and I dropped the entire thing in the pool. We still ate it. #canthang
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
If I die tonight, you and your brother can split my money evenly for college only.
all $38?
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
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