Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
My ATM looks so different sober.
As hard as i've been partying lately their gonna have to revoke my organ donor status
Who the fuck superglued glowsticks to my arm.
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
Thanks for the morning blowjob. Scientifically proven you can't have a bad day if it starts with a blowjob.
I'm stoned as hell watching the new Star Trek movie. My life is 110% better than it was an hour ago.
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
I showed up to a job interview wearing two different shoes. If that's not an omen, I don't know what is.
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
What the hell did you do last night?
I embarrassed myself, my family, name, and possibly my country.
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
Randomize