your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
so im in the parking lot of taco bell eating a taco...and some girl just got out of a car and screamed at the top of her lungs "XANEX FOR SALE!!!!" i fucking love Hamilton.
i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
I'm destined to be knocked up by a sailor
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
just bought 2000 rhinestones and a heart shaped stencil at Micheals...I think the cashier knows i'm Vajazzling
And, through a series of unfortunate events, I am at my grandmothers birthday party in a short dress and no underwear
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
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