Dan is more possessive of me than a Michael Jackson is of McCully Caulkin
was*
True, R.I.P.
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
You know you're stoned when you tell your dog you're stoned only to realise he's not in the pickup
I have tasted many bathrooms
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
Only in this town do you have a bridesmaid shortage due to pregnancies.
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
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