I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
The fact that when I blacked in you were sober enough to kick me out of your roommates bed makes me question our friendship.
Liver, I have supported you for 18 fucking years. Pull your weight for ONE NIGHT and detoxify this alcohol.
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
If I don't go to Australia I'm using that towards a new car. If I do I'll use it to buy a koala.
Yeah, reverse cow girl. She was on top and I was playing Flappy Bird behind her back. Easiest way to have angry sex.
Flatmate got laid for the first time in 3 years. I'm baking a cake.
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
When i said i was brazilian i swear to god he started to tear up
I don't know what you're doing this morning, but obtaining Plan B is my number-one priority.
There are flour footprints all over the house. Either u guys are trying to pull that Paranormal Activity shit on me again, or u got drunk and tried to make pancakes.
my roommates gone so i can take codeine and sleep naked
Randomize
