She actually said during sex "the only thing that would make this more perfect is if we were listening to Lenny Kravitz"
So, obviously, you had to give a fake number this morning.
Yes. Also, we may never be able to go back to that bar again.
when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
I lost control in the snow and hit a parked car. I went into our building to get a pen and paper to leave a note and when I came back the car was gone and there was a hot girl there. I used the pen and paper to get her number.
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
You should probably wake up already as I have yet another story for you. Teaser? Blood from knife wound. Tequila. Guitar hero. Kitchen counter. Lawyer.
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
I was giving this guy head and he stopped me to look me in the eyes and say "you have a gift"
How many people slept in the bouncy castle last night?
4 guys, 1 girl. Pretty sure were gonna have to pay the cleaning fee
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
Then he shook the next streetlight but this one broke and fell over. He told me, "This is the part where we run."
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
Whoever said it shouldn't take a man to make you happy clearly wasn't having sex everyday.
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