you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
We were sexting and at the end, instead of us having sex, he decided to put "we fell asleep in each others arms."
When I unzipped my pants I said "Release the Cracken"... she dug it so we're getting married soon.
it glows. i had to have it.
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
You were almost as fucked up as I was the night I hooked up with a bob saget look alike...
I swear my vagina formed calluses just to deal with how big he is
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
Anyone who does not consider cereal and wine as a balanced breakfast needs to leave immediately.
The first thing my Christmas gift money is buying is a dildo.
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
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