doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
my house keeper must think I'm a prostitute.
I'm pretty sure there's seven mailboxes in the bathtub...
This situation is one cop call away from being a Lifetime movie.
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
it's like russian roulette but with a penis
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life.
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
I'm either hallucinating or there is a dying cat outside my apartment....
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