were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
when she said she's going upstairs to put her "play clothes" on, I knew either she was a pervert or a kindergarten teacher. Either way, I wasn't going to leave. She's a pervert by the way.
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
drunk her ninja stole one of the pizzas as it arrived and hid all of the pieces in a cereal box in the fridge.Genius.
I love that your nipples always taste like clean laundry.
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
We went to Denny's and he threatened to fight an entire high school track team by himself
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
1. My arms are cement 2. I wish dogs could answer the phone
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
yknow last night was like... the third night in a row alex woke me up to make sure i wasn't dead and tbh it's sorta sweet.
Between falling off a shelf on to a concrete floor and sex with you - i may never walk again.
Randomize
