I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
You thought cars couldnt see you if you stuck your head in the mail box
He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
Seriously, do normal people actually get work done being this hungover? No wonder the economy's in the shitter
Bring one of those heart stabber things in case you go into shock. I'll jab you.
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
She leaned in close to me, made eye contact, and seriously whispered "I will eat your soul with bacon bits." I want whatever drug she was on.
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
I just imagined myself as R2-D2 and you as C3P0 walking around the Vegas desert looking for alcohol
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
You screamed out "happy birthday Jesus" followed by chugging Bacardi straight out the bottle
The highlight of my night will be digging in other people's garbage
You now have a new job. Call me around 1pm everyday and make sure I've eaten something. All I've had today is dick and cheesecake.
Randomize
