it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
Woke up in a closet. I'm not drinking till summer.
I am more sore today than I was after my car wreck. Take it as a compliment that you bang harder than a semi-truck.
You should really come over right now. There's hot construction workers across the street. I'm gonna go pour beer on myself in a bikini on the sidewalk. See you in 5?
I'm tired of stuffing my fat into a slutty costume. Next year let's go as homeless girls. Cute ones. In leggings with camel toe.
You yelled "hold my dick" before you tackled the guy away from the dj and two random girls moved to actually hold it, then argued about it. I want that whore aura!
I have no idea, but there's a bus parked in front of my house and like 6 texts saying im gonna prove my love. this is either really really awesome or really really bad.
Hey dude this is some next level no homo shit but im gonna get 2 tickets to the opera and go Hail Mary on this one girl. U take the extra ticket if i fail.
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
I've never heard "I will drown your mother in vanilla pudding" as an insult before, and then last night happened.
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
Apparently I blamed my BAC on the Saint Louis Cardinals...how is that not a valid excuse?!
He told me their parents think of me as the "drunk friend"...oddly enough, I'm ok with that
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