Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
Also, as my manager i'm going to put you in charge of making sure i don't drown.
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
If the river was whiskey, it would be the best river ever.
I found her in my pantry with her shirt off twerking...I tapped her on the shoulder and she said she was giving Chef Boyardee a show and to give her a minute...
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
Randomize