Came home and the girl was sitting on the steps "talking" on her ipod touch AND was halfway done eating a raw cucumber.
Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
My autobiography is now tentatively titled "I'm Fucking the DJ, and Other Ways to Party for Cheap"
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
As I sit on the toilet at 4 am I realize tonight could have gone a lot better
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
By the way, do you realize that you asked me how much you could get for your eggs last night. And once you learned the price said that you had plenty to share.
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
I got horny for like a second but the eggplant snapped me out of it
I left my Bacardi and dignity in your freezer. Will come get it later.
Randomize
