Call me when you're up
Great dream, you were in it
It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
I think I just sat on my labia. Can I borrow some scotch tape?
it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
Dude, she brought over peach cobbler, weed and alcohol plus I'm gonna get laid. She's by far the coolest sister you have.
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
I'll never be able to have sex on these sheets. I'd have to cover up the eyes of every single Elmo.
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
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