I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
The tricky part is not getting sand in any orifices. Or is the plural orifi? Orifi don't, we'll both be unhappy...
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
Great. Me and the intoxalock guy are getting so close he just said "alright see you later girl!" when I called about getting the blower recallibrated.
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
Bring the cards this coming weekend. If I'm not here I died skydiving Friday
All of the sudden your world had become nothing but the sum of visible dicks. Welcome to life.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
Every Easter every single one the baby Jesus butt plug comes up
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
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