What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
i either just vomited on a lesbian or a small boy
Legit screaming match in this bar over the differences between cupcakes and muffins.
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
I'm figuring, since someone shoved pizza crust in my ear last night, there might be some leftover pizza.
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
You talked about giving to sperm banks on a first date. What did you expect?
Like sorry you chose to have an attractive girlfriend dude
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
I feel like too many of my sentences start of with "Hey, fuckface!"
How did they ever let a trainwreck like myself run a bar?!
what the fuck is wrong with you
Do you want me to go chronologically or alphabetically?
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
Randomize
