just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
Dude I got a text from you at 1:30 last night and you didn't use any vowels
Haha, I didn't want to buy any... we're in a recession you know
you're like a bully in the Christmas story
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
What's the wine called that we really like and we usually drink it with xanax?
I'm riding in a wheelchair, being pulled by a golf cart. You need to be here.
I woke up in bed alone w 2 bite marks on my boob... Salt and pepper shakers In my purse along w a bottle of steak sauce.... The drunkasauraus has struck again
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
I like that you're Jewish, because you can rail me on Christmas Eve and it won't be weird.
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
I learned a very valuable lesson tonight...don't touch a cops tazer
Do you think I need to report to HR that the intern and I had butt sex?
On a unprofessional note, there's a new girl in photo.
That wasn't unprofessional. The fact that I'm going to fuck her is unprofessional.
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
Randomize
