Sometimes I wonder if my friend studies mystic Christian theology because he's afraid to come out of the closet. Evidently, it's okay to talk about God coming inside you, but not to say the same about dudes.
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
Walked home this morning with my contacts in a shot glass.
First class.
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
You kind of have a nervous, desperate thing going on that isn't exactly catnip for bitches
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
I'm on a treadmill at the gym ordering pizza on my phone so it'll get to my house around the time I get home. I NEED HELP. Or I'm a genius. I haven't decided.
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
there's still a lot i don't remember, like why my iphone's nailed to your wall
Last night I realized I made a dick appt 2 MONTHS IN ADVANCE!!!!....... WHO THE HELL DOES THAT!?!? LMAO!
just woke up to an abnormally swollen ankle (broken, perhaps?) and a shirtless man with the most beautiful abs I've ever seen sleeping on my floor.
is your ankle ok??
WHY IS HE ON THE FLOOR. SINCE WHEN DOES BLACKOUT ME ALSO COCKBLOCK ME
I need to find a divorced guy with a boat and let my tits do the talking
Randomize
