you know what would be great? if dirt tasted like steak and could get you drunk.
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
I just found him singing into an empty paper towel roll while microwaving an empty ice cream carton. I'm gonna run away now.
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
While you were in the ER we decided to tailgate in the parking lot until security told us that's not allowed.
We haven't even moved into the apartment yet and she has already screwed two of our neighbors. This is going to be the longest 12 month lease of my life.
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
I have mastered the 3 minute room cleaning drill in preparation for the nights possible slam-piece
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
How many of my Tinder dates can my Christian roommate accidentally meet in the hallway at 3am before she's horrified and moves out?
Do you know who these girls are? They're baking a cake, making chicken enchiladas, and bringing me beer everytime I finish one.
Randomize
